I want to start by saying a HUGE congratulations! If you’re reading this I assume you’re either a relatively new parent, or you’re on your way to becoming one. When we had our little guy it was the best, most overwhelming, stressful, and relieving day of my life – so many conflicting emotions all at once. Take a deep breath, give yourself grace to feel what you feel right now, and know that your new life will very quickly become your best life – just remember that the baby isn’t the only new thing around here, you’re new parents too!
One thing that was always said to me while I was pregnant was “Sleep now, because you’ll never sleep again.” It DROVE ME NUTS. Why don’t we tell soon to be/new parents all of the wonderful things that are in store for them versus make then nervous about something that hasn’t happened – there are wonderfully fabulous things awaiting you [End Rant].
I’m here to tell you babies CAN sleep, and they can be FABULOUS sleepers. There sleep can be reliable, consistent and totally worth the effort it takes to get them there. Below are some of my tips for starting out with newborns, and when is a good time to start sleep training!
Newborn babies can have a bit of a messed up circadian rhythm. This is due to the fact that they’ve never really had to officially ‘sleep’ at a certain time of the day/night. So if your little one wants to party during the night and sleep during the day, that’s ok. Just expose them to the light as much as possible during the daytime, and set a bedtime routine to help to signify bedtime.
A wake window for a newborn is 45-60 minutes. All that means is that after 45 minutes of being away your little one needs to sleep again – and these naps are very inconsistent. They can range from 20 minutes to a few hours. Don’t be discouraged, just try to be consistent with always allowing them to sleep. They don’t always need to sleep in their crib/bassinet either, at this age they can sleep basically anywhere- and that’s a great thing!
For newborn babies I am a big fan of swaddling. This helps to contain their Moro Reflex, which is their startle reflex. The Moro Reflex can make it tough for them to sleep, but it goes away after a while. I recommend swaddling until around 8-10 weeks, then it’s time to transition to a sleep sac!
Bedtime Routine: It’s important that from the beginning you establish a bedtime routine. Overtime your baby will get used to their routine and come to recognize it. I recommend most of it being in the room that they plan on sleeping in, start with a clean diaper, warm pjs, swaddle, then sit and read a book/sing a song and then have the last feed of the day. When babies are really young it is ok to keep the feed as close to bed as possible, just as their bellies are so small. Then into their bed for (hopefully) a nice long stretch.
White Noise: I’m a fan of white noise, and very young babies are often soothed by it due to the fact that it reminds them of the sounds that they heard in the womb.
Monitor: A video monitor which very clearly shows your little one in their sleeping space is really important. You can often set them to notify you when the child makes any noise so that you can be aware of what is going on, and if you can find one, I recommend getting one that shows the temperature in the child’s room. This will help for monitoring the temperature without you having to run in and out of the room to check it – possibly disturbing your sleeping child.
Sleep Safety: For young babies it is so important that their sleeping space be safe. Canadian guidelines recommend to keep the baby in their crib/bassinet in the parent’s room for the first 6 months, that the sleeping surface be firm and flat, that the crib be totally empty except for a crib sheet and a baby, and that baby is ALWAYS laid on their back. These are extremely important guidelines to follow, and I always stand by them.
Finally – when can we start formal sleep training? I don’t start formal sleep training until 3 months at the earliest, but I normally start around 4 months. Feeding is normally well established at this point, and we can see great progress relatively quickly. Naps are still quite unpredictable until around 6 months of age, but setting your little ones up with the skills for great sleep will only help them improve as time goes on!
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